half life vs afterlife

lots of people believe in life after death....much better than reincarnation as a plant.
i suppose that the afterlife is better than the current life......so why live this life at all? would it not be better to just die.....to just leave the miseries behind?if that's the case, why don't we hear of suicides left right n centre?
so many ways to die....drown...pills...wrist cuts....ironically, most suicide attempts fail. simply because you get the screaming will to life just after you cut your wrists or take pills or whatever, so u go tell someone.
i'm not brave enough (or pathetic enough, or so depressed) to actually die by my own hand.
somethimes i wonder what will become of me after school....i want to stay like this forever.....i'm scared of what the future will do to me.
i think i've said enough
i think i've said too much.